Tuesday, April 29, 2014

Vellfire :p

Last night.While i was preparing dinner.

Daddy : Yang cuba dgr iman ckp apa pasal vellfire. Daddy tak faham.
Mommy : Iman, iman ckp apa.
Iman : O Allah. Bless us, %&**$#@(**%^ had given us. And save us fwom the @#*&&$% of the hellfire.
Mommy : Errmmmmm...ohoo..pandai! Doa makan ke Iman?
Iman : Haah.*beaming*
Daddy : Laaaaaaa.. sepatah haram pn daddy tak faham @_@

Iman's english is still improving. Some are still jibberish.
Well, he even calls his shoes 'lasut!" (ie kasut)

The actual wordings ::

Allahomma barik lana fima razaqtana waqina athaban-nar. Bismillah.
Oh Allah! Bless us for all you have given to us and save us from the punishment of the hellfire

Hehehehe..jauh tersasar tak?LOL!
Happy Tuesday peeps!


Monday, April 28, 2014


Hello there!
Happy Monday so far?
Harini ada org baik hati blanja lunch kat OU td. So mood jd sgt baik :)

Sunday was a rainy day.
Down with flu, tekak Rasa sedap je mkn roti jala..so marilah buka buku2 resipi lama..dan menjala.nice resipi..worth to share. But i really need to refine my 'menjala' skills!

Oklah for a 1st timer,kan?


Easy peasy as abc. Why didn't i do this before?


3cups flour
3cups water..can also use milk
2tbsp oil
1tsp serbuk kunyit
1tsp salt

Blend to fine texture.
Selamat menjala!

Hidang bersama gulai ayam atau susu pekat manis.nyum nyum!!

Busy day today.kita cerita roti jala jelah dulu eh...



Mommy z

posted from Bloggeroid

Friday, April 25, 2014

Mencarut pagi pagi

Morning peeps!
Bukan mencarut sgt lah.
Just discussing with Iman some words he learnt.
Well, somewhere.

Two days dah Iman stayed kat school, after school for day-care.
Alhamdulillah he loves it as for now.
Dah boleh cope nampaknya. and dah dpt sesuaikan diri.

Schooling is total fun.
But with some draw-backs as well bila dh jumpa ramai budak-budak from different backgrounds.

I caught Iman saying 'babi' few times.
And in intense and 'correct' situation. Macam waktu dia tak puas hati and kena marah.
Yang plg tak tahan tu he said it to me.
I know for sure, he doesn;t even know the meaning of the word, and how it is so absurd in our society to say such thing to other ppl.
Terpengaruh dgn siapalah ni sayang?

Well the damage had been done.

So few days ago, i sat down with him. And asked him to bring me his farm animal book.
Sampai di page with pigs on it, i asked him " ini apa iman"
"Pigs..oink oink" -well i'm open about pigs and dogs in terms of knowledge-
"Dirty kan pigs..eiii..yucks!?"
" Eii..dirty! Pigs suka mkn sampah kan mommy?"
"Yups pigs suka makan sampah, well iman, horse in malay apa?
"Pandai! Well, cows?"
"Pandai! Well, now, pigs?"
"Ermm...apa mommy?"*confused face*
"well, pigs are babi, babi tu pigs.."
" Haaaa? babi tu tak baik...nanti mommy cili sos kan mulut!"
" Hmm.pandai pun..Tp babi tu pigs. Klu kita ckp org babi, kita samakan dia dgn pigs. makan sampah.dirty..takbaik kan?"
"Iman faham tak?"
"Faham. Tp boleh ke cakap babi?"
"Ish..sebab tulah tak boleh, mana boleh ckp tak baik kat org.."
"oooooooooo..habis boleh ckp apa?"
"Boleh ckp yang baik baik je.."
"Boleh ckp kuda?"
"Kuda boleh, tp kenapa nk cakap kuda?"
" Heheheheheehe....amsyaaarrr kuuudddaaaaaa!"
*runs away*

I really hopes he remembers that.really.
But then later..

Iman : " Daddy do you know babi tu apa?"
" Babi? *jeleing to mommy* Hish cakap apa ni?"
" Ni lah babi.." *showing his farm animals book*
" Yups ini babi. pig"
"Takbaik kan ckp babi daddy?"
" Yups tak baik"



Daddy : Yang,Ok ke ajar dia cmni?
Mommy: At least dia tahu perkara sebenar.


I'm far from being a good mom.
But really hoping to be a good example and moral icon for Iman.
Well, all moms out there does too kan?


Happy weekends lovelies!
Payday weekend! Yeay!

*urghhh..finally payday!*



Thursday, April 24, 2014

Countries I wish to visit...

...err maybe someday :)

There are places I really want to visit, and may it be with my partner or with the boys :) Born and raised until 6yrs old in the US makes my memories of being there, were like an old classic film.We came back home in 1990 so that i could start school soon (that time).

 I barely could remember it there. Things i remembered, were the snow, the cat we used to have, Taco Bell, the chocolate Autumn lawn, Walmart and of course the Sesame Street..hehehe. Just to name a few. i would love to go again if given the chance for sure. Well, it had been 24 yrs ago.
Daddy once upon a time ago..mcm amsyar kan?

Banyaknya countries yang masih belum pergi! Yang dah pergi pun boleh kira dgn jari ;p

If we have the rezeki soon, here would be where i want to go most.
Maybe before 40? Inshallah.

1. Istambul, Turkey

2. Japan!

3.  Magical Romania :)

4.  Italy!

Wish and dreams are free aren't they?

*saving pennies starting from now!*


Have a nice day peeps!



Tuesday, April 22, 2014

Homeschooling activities :: Iman, puzzles and workbooks

Iman is 3 this year.

In exact, today he turns 38mths. And he already attends playschool everyday.

My objective actually was just to introduce him to a new world,where he could play n learn, and grow relationships with new friends. I'm not really into pushing him in completing his homework and putting a target of he must achieve a certain level of reading books. Well he's only 3, and the world was supposed to revolve around him, still.

Alhamdulillah, at 3, Iman's terrible two issues subsided. He's now more attentive and loves the flexibility i gave him in doing whatever he wants with his workbook. It's sometimes entertaining to watch how he sees things in his book. Be it matching animals with silhouettes or drawing the nose and eyes of an empty face, Be point is really to encourage him to answer why he did this and that. Why he colored the elephant pink or the horse blue. And may the rainbow have all the colors of the world if he wants it to. Let the imagination grow. At this age, nothing is wrong. For me, to do the correct thing in workbook is not really the main objective at this age :)

Well, it is really up to you as a parent to point your kid in any direction you liked. For me, small children are all unique, even close siblings. Each and everyone differs from each other individually and some traits were already with the child since birth. I'm really against force and spoon feeding, and if I things get to go my way, I choose to home-school my children and let them sit for O-level at 14. Only if. Sobs.

It is supposed to be fun and full of excitement growing up, so mom's don't fret, if your small child does not finish his homework at 5yrs old. I seldom finish mine at 10. Hehehe.

I love to look at things differently actually. In Iman's and Amsyar's home-school sessions, I tried to put aside things that looked like 'schooling'. We'll have activities 30mins for each at most. And move from one activity to another if the attention is already changed or the mood had already swayed.

Amsyar may not be able to sing abc or read but he can now differenciate t-rex from stegosaurus, and knows branchiosaurus eats greens.and iman counts baby maiosaura in its nest up to 10. But sometimes a cuddle and a storybook just makes it more than enough for us too. Alhmdulillah.

Sometimes a game of puzzle is a good matching and compute game for toddlers. As both does not yet recognize letters, Iman helps amsyar match by color, and shape. I would rather watch and observe how both solve problems. Its amazing what a 3yr old could tell and explain to lil 2 yr old brother :)

Both loves books, like mommy and we can now have reading sessions upstairs while daddy finish his football match.Of course mommy with mommy's book and a cup of coffee, while the boys whether read to themselves or share a book for two.heaven just how I liked it to be. Im a bookworm of course and daddy's not.and I would really want my boys to find the joy and excitement I found in books.I love watching then mingle with books. 

I have tons at home.and many torn and destroyed as well by them.but as I have mentioned before, let them be. Books can be bought easily, the interest is not. Once u lost them, it will be really difficult to instil them again :)

Well, just some ideas for the weekend fun at home.




Tuesday morning the sun is shining.

Just to write out some burden. To loosen out a bit.

Stressed out with CIMB. The synchronization in between depts. It has been 89+working days.
And still pending. Gilaa...Burned out with people with different wavelengths who have different way of thinking.I'll try to fight for my right. And never give up! This case had really took a toll on my mood these days.

Hope for things to turn out OK.

Too many things that makes me stressed out these day.

The neighbour who parks infront of my house for months not wanting to move his car.
We plan to write 'for sale' on an empty bottle and put it on the car tonite.hahaha..monster neighbour.

The girl who is married for 2mths+ but pregnant with 4.
I could smell fishy things when the morning sickness and baby bump was 2wks after her solemnization.
2 weeks? like seriously? Then i knew.Hmm. takpelah.good for her to cover up things rapidly.
The baby is innocent. That is what matters most.
But too fragile to even stand up during a meeting.
Memalukan kaum perempuan betul.
still a loooong way to go adik

Hmm..budak budak zaman skrg.
May all things be good for you.

And is just Maybe its just time to turn the leaf upside down.

Dear May..please come quickly. Dear Saturday..please come quick too..
I really need a good rest for now.

Monday, April 21, 2014

Picky Eater's Choice : Spidey Pasta!

Simple but interesting!
And the best thing it works!

Let's see..

Poke through your favorite cut out sausages. Fettucini, angle hair or spagetti will do.
Depends on which species of spider you want to make that day, your pasta could be as long as you like.
Me, i'm making short legged spidey.hahaha..

Rebus in chicken soup, or just plain salt water with a tsp of oil.
  Serve with veggies as eyes (i used carrots but forgot to snap a picture)!Yeah!



Faces after finishing 6 spideys..hehehehe

kembang idung idung chewing off spideys!


And adik..of course.
Well umm...
Ate only the short legs!

No camera pls mommy!

Have a nice Monday lovelies!
Still feel guilty for forgeting Iman's on Holiday today and made him bathe and wear uniforms (--")
Well, mommy needs a vacation i guess. Or a shopping spree ;p


Mommy Z

Friday, April 18, 2014

Berpisah susu

Gambar macho abg amsyar satu :)
Abg amsyar sb this yr nak dpt lg dua adik spupu :)

This coming May this little boy I named Zulhafidzey Amsyar is turning 2. Alhmdulillah.

Cuma harini nak bercerita tentang cerai susu. This may not be everyone's cup of tea, but its ok, menambahkan ilmu.if you have been following my blog (really thank you for that!) i believe that u know i really write about anything, from treatments,happenings, politics, you name it. Caca merba, but this is what life is.I really love little projects to research and work with, and share some interesting findings

Alhmdulillah, amsyar was fully breastfed until 1 yr old, and then was on alternate milk until 18mths.Then mommy stopped pumping.and cont only feedings at night. Balik kerja je, mmg seronok la amsyar, bila supply full je.mommy plak kuat mkn.byk lah susunya..hahaha.Alhmdulillah..I feel so blessed. I do believe that after 1yr, when the child starts eating good food, mommy's milk is just supplementary, and of course the method for the baby to feel comfortably hugged by the mom.

But reaching 24mths ni, I feel that i had enough.
amsyar had enough feedings.sometimes he just need the cuddles which he had related with being breastfed eversince he was born. So I guess cerai susu will surely be a big deal to him.

I tried to be very gentle and subtle to not let him feel rejected. So I limit the nursing time gradually and tried to procrastinate at times, telling him.." sekejap sayang mommy mandi dulu.." or " makan nasi dulu lepas lepas ni kita minum ok". Or sometimes the drastic "susu habis lah adik..kejap lg baru ada". Cruel eh? Hahaha.

Well 2yrs is quite enough.

Some suggested to put some asam jawa.or maybe a little salt. Tp xsanggup lg kot.
Maybe gradually will work.
Night feedings pun i've limited to bedtime only. In the middle of the nights, kalau nak, kita bg botol susu. 

Tgn debab..main vacuum mommy!

I target to wholly stop by this coming 23rd of May, another 1 mth+ to go adik.Mommy know u'll survive. Ur a big boy now, kan? Don't worry mommy love you always, sayang semestinya.

Pray for me. Inshallah will be OK.


Have a nice weekend peeps!


Thursday, April 17, 2014

The Road not Taken

A poem, learned long ago..but yet to be understood recently...

The Road Not Taken

by Robert Frost

Two roads diverged in a yellow wood,
And sorry I could not travel both
And be one traveler, long I stood
And looked down one as far as I could
To where it bent in the undergrowth;

Then took the other, as just as fair,
And having perhaps the better claim,
Because it was grassy and wanted wear;
Though as for that the passing there
Had worn them really about the same,

And both that morning equally lay
In leaves no step had trodden black.
Oh, I kept the first for another day!
Yet knowing how way leads on to way,
I doubted if I should ever come back.

I shall be telling this with a sigh
Somewhere ages and ages hence:
Two roads diverged in a wood, and I—
I took the one less traveled by,
And that has made all the difference.

Wednesday, April 16, 2014

Organization Behavior. Something to learn about from the prophet Muhammad SAW.

Assalam peeps

I took this subject long ago and management studies was always fun and interesting for me.
Maybe, time by time we need to be reminded and remind others as well.
I would really take my CIMB case as one of the examples. But let it wait as it is still unsettled on their side.
I have pledge a report to BNM just so others won't suffer the same incident as i did. Well, i chose to see the glass half full instead, and try to learn something from things happening around me.

Moga Allah permudahkan urusan kami.
Jom baca tambahkan pengetahuan :)

Organization Behavior. Something to learn about from the prophet Muhammad SAW.

The Prophet Muhammad was reported to have said: “Each of you is a shepherd and each of you is responsible for his flock …” [Abu Dawud]As described in the hadith above, all of us are answerable to our subjects. As managers, we are shepherds too and are answerable in two ways: As a servant who is a guardian over the property of his master (the employer).As a caliph who is a shepherd over the people and shall be questioned about his subjects (the subordinates).This two-way balance is a tight rope to walk on, which often results in one of the two sides being offended. 

A manager who is productive leads his team to realize the vision of the organization that they all are a part of. He has to direct his sheep in the right direction, guarding them and not allowing them to go astray. On top of that, there may be ‘black sheep’ that he needs to identify and prevent from leading others astray.

Productive Team, Productive Manager

For a manager to be productive, he should have a productive team. However, that is not always possible since, in most cases, teams are composed of individuals with varied levels of qualifications and experience. It becomes imperative for a manager to groom his team members so they can fulfill their fullest potential. You are a manager because you are considered to be most qualified and experienced among your team members. Below are some of the qualities a manager should possess to make himself and his team more productive.

Lead by Example

Your team works under your guidance. At times when they are stuck, you need to roll up your sleeves and get involved to solve critical issues. While doing so, you should not be boasting your contribution or belittling theirs.The companions of the Holy Prophet were die-hard soldiers and never wanted any pain for him. Yet many a time, the Prophet joined them in digging trenches, toiling in the battle grounds and even in building Al-Masjid an-Nabawi brick by brick, ”… The Prophet himself started carrying unburnt bricks for its building …” [Bukhari]

You need to build your team, task by task, project by project. If there is something on which your team is at odds with you, but you know your decision to be correct, you need to persuade others.One of the ways to do this is to start doing the action yourself. They will automatically follow suit, In sha Allah.A similar thing happened when most of the companions did not agree with the concessions given to the opponents in the treaty of Hudaibiyya. They were reluctant to come out of the state of Ihram without performing the Umrah. The Holy Prophet continued with what he thought was right. He then “… slaughtered the sacrifice and called his barber who shaved his head. Seeing that, the companions of the Prophet got up, slaughtered their sacrifices, and started shaving the heads of one another …” [Bukhari]

Integrity is Better Than Intelligence

This is a management saying and generally applied by recruitment specialists who are faced with a trade-off between the intelligence and honesty of a candidate. Many of them prefer a honest candidate over an intelligent one.Managers can apply this concept to themselves too. Being intelligent is a part of your job because your position demands so, but you need to be honest while executing your affairs dealing with your subjects.

The Holy Prophet said: “Any man whom Allah has given the authority of ruling some people, and he does not look after them in an honest manner, will never feel even the smell of Paradise.” [Bukhari]

Be Just

As a manager, one of the biggest trials you may face is being just, especially in a multicultural, multilingual and multi-ethnic environment. Personal likes and dislikes based on these factors tend to creep in while making decisions affecting the team, preventing them to be well-knitted. If two or more members are at odds with one another and you are required to be a judge, you must be just. Favoring a member over the other based on your personal preference causes resentments within the team and you will also lose respect.

The Holy Qur’an asks us to be just: “O you who have believed, be persistently standing firm for Allah, witnesses in justice, and do not let the hatred of a people prevent you from being just. Be just; that is nearer to righteousness. And fear Allah; indeed, Allah is acquainted with what you do.” [Qur’an: Chapter 5, Verse 8]

There are numerous narrations of the Holy Prophet delivering just verdicts, no matter the person’s background or religion. In one such incident, the Prophet relied on the oath of a defendant Jew even though the claimant was a Muslim because the latter lacked evidence to prove his claim. The dispute between Ash’ath bin Qais and a Jewish man is detailed in Sunan Ibn Majah.

Be Cheerful

If your absence makes people cheerful and your entrance brings silence in the office, you are an authoritarian manager and not a lenient one.The Holy Prophet told Aisha : “… be lenient, for leniency makes a thing decorated and when it is removed from a thing it makes it defective.” [Abu Dawud]

Also Mu’adh was advised by the Holy Prophet while being sent to Yemen on a mission: “Show leniency (to the people); don’t be hard upon them; give them glad tidings; and do not create aversion. Work in collaboration and don’t be divided.” [Muslim]

Being friendly and cheerful with your subordinates makes them feel comfortable. Creating a friendly atmosphere is a way to invite their ideas, whereas a restricted environment prevents them from sharing their ideas. The Holy Prophet said: “Do not belittle any good deed, even meeting your brother (Muslim) with a cheerful face.” [Muslim] 

Avoid using harsh words since “Allah is Gentle and loves gentleness, and He grants reward for it that He does not grant for harshness.” [Ibn Majah]

Be a Mentor

Your success as a manager depends on the strength of your team. To make your team strong, you have to be a mentor. Organize training and workshops for them depending on their job function, then meet them regularly to provide some insights on what you have gained through your overall experience. 
Let them have a feeling of ‘growing together’.

Be Flexible

If your organization allows, you may also try flexible working hours for your workers. Flexibility in working hours sometime enables them to fulfill their household duties too, like dropping or picking kids to or from school, or attending to an ailing loved one. If required to work at odd hours, taking advantage of information technology, you may also consider allowing a member to work from home. This is definitely a possible option since we live in an age where a person can connect to his office network from his home computer.

Focus on Issues at Hand

Keeping yourself focused on the task at hand leads to better management and quicker delivery. Make your meetings conclusive by discussing and deliberating only the purpose of the meeting. Do not let your attention divert from the topic and remind others to stick to the agenda. If any other topic comes up, politely ask them to keep it aside for a separate discussion. This will not only keep you focused on one task at a time, but your colleagues’ time will be better utilized too. Once you have finished the meeting, write the minutes and circulate among the stakeholders what you have discussed and decided. Even if the meeting was inconclusive, it is better to write and circulate the minutes so the attendees can recall what you already discussed and what needs to be discussed during the next meeting.

Consultation and Participation

When the Makkan army marched towards Madinah, the Prophet wanted to defend Madinah from within. But it was the suggestion of some companions, most of them in their youth, to go out and fight. He agreed to their advice and thus the historic battle at Uhud took place.As a manager, you must consult your team and invite the participation of the younger members as well. This serves as a big motivation and generates a sense of involvement of even the less experienced ones. Decisions based on consultations often yield productive results. The Quran also emphasizes on consultation: “… and consult them in the matter…” [Qur’an: Chapter 3, Verse 159]

Convince, not Confuse

You do not have to adopt the “If not convinced, confuse” theory. If you do, you are bound to lose trust among your team and co-workers. If someone comes to you with his problem, he comes with a hope of getting a solution from you. You need to address his concerns rather than using jugglery of words and making the situation confusing and worse for him.Moreover, confusing someone deliberately is akin to misguiding him. Keep things simple and explanation clear. If they are not convinced, try different means of communication to explain, such as explaining through writing, or a graphical display, or any other form of presentation.

Trust Your Team

Adopt a non-interference doctrine once you have assigned a task to your team. Frequent follow-up bugs them ( yeah, i have a boss who does this ;p). The individuals in the team will then try to finish off the tasks ‘quickly anyhow’, rather than completing correctly and efficiently. Give them some breathing space and let them be on their own to perform, unless you see something going wrong or your interference is extremely necessary. Instead, design a follow-up meeting schedule to review their progress on the tasks.

Rotate Tasks

Adopt a policy of ‘cyclic rotation’ of tasks if there are more members in the team and adopt the ‘hand-shake’ method when exchanging tasks between two members. Performing the same task daily makes it monotonous for them. Newer assignments provides them with an opportunity to learn something new, making them more interested in their jobs. Different ideas from different individual adds value to the way certain tasks are being done. One of the benefits of exchanging and rotating tasks is that you are not left limping with an unexpected resignation or temporary unavailability of a member who was handling critical tasks of which nobody else is aware. Maintaining your team as a unit ensures greater productivity. Building a team is a managerial skill, but it can be considered an act of virtue too in light of how the Holy Prophet joined the emigrants and the ansar together as brothers for a mission. 

When an employee leaves, the manager also needs to self-reflect. As many management experts say, “The employee does not leave an organization, he leaves the manager.”


Mommy Zahra

posted from Bloggeroid

Tuesday, April 15, 2014

Puding Karamel Kukus version ii

Puding Karamel Kukus version ii

Gula Hangus
1cup sugar
1cup water

5 eggs
1 tin evaporated milk
1/4 tin water
3 tbsp sugar
1 tbsp custard powder
1 tsp vanilla essence

Cara cara :-

Masak gula diatas dapur, setelah mencair dan separa hangus.masukkan air dan kacau sebati.tuang ke dln acuan
Kacau 5biji telur lembut sehingga bercampur kuning dan putihnya.masukkan tepung kastad, vanilla essence dan kacau lagi.ketepikan.
Panaskan susu bersama air dan gula.sehingga panas tapi tidak sampai didih.tutup api.
Masukkan adunan susu kedlm telur sambil mengacau.setelah sebati tuangkan ke dlm acuan berisi gula hangus td.
Kukus selama 20-30 minit.
Sejukkan.terbalikkan dan hidang!

A nice recipe to keep for the weekends :)

Mommy had been sick for awhile.was on MC yesterday sb xtahan.
Today working although not very ok and vomiting.
Had a cup of coffee, but still nauseous. Oh my :'(

Please Allah give me strength.

Friday, April 11, 2014

VBA2C - The inspiring thoughts for me

" Stop worrying of what will go wrong and start being positive of what might go right"

Collected by a dear sister in vbac/ICAN Malaysia community.
A topic in ICAN group Malaysia about "How will you remember your csections this April" in the conjuction of Cesarean Awareness Month. Support for whoever you are who plan for VBAC/VBAMC.

Well a doctor may have all the words she/he wants to say to make you agree to go under the knife. Wait until she had to go under too and let her colleague cut her tummy up.

Thank you sis!

My 1st scar turn 3 this 6th June.. Since I start preggy my no.2, I start gain knowlegde more & more about birth, more than during my pharmacy student life  thanks to Maria Zain (VBA2C) & Sofia Azyze (VBA4C) for gave me such inspiration to achieve my dream birth.. Alhamdulillah, I had a wonderful homebirth exactly 25 months after my 1st scar.

Allah is the best planner. Now I can smile seeing my scars (2 csects 2007, 2009). My first scar was so ugly. So thick with keloid. (Itchy summore). My second csect the doctors did an excellent job scrubbing off the keloid and left only a very thin line. I would like to remember the 2nd csect as my beauty makeover. And to have a very beautiful natural birth after 4.5 years after that, is priceless. I have prepared myself for the long hours of contraction journeyed by vbamc moms. Alhamdulillah it was just a "short" 6 hours labour.

My scar will turn 8 October this year. I recovered from the physical cut without issues but I'm still recovering from the emotional scar it left me. Most mums were conscious when they had to go through their csect, I wasn't. I had a bad reaction to the anaesthesia and was not there when my daughter came to this world. I regained consciousness 2 days after the surgery and no feelngs registered. That emotional scar still lingers until today. About 5 years after the cut, I had a drug free hospy VBAC in 2010, and a homebirth in 2011. My scarred womb went through a total of 77 hours of labor. InsyaAllah sisters, with the right knowledge and placing your faith at the right place, you can birth the way we're intended to birth.

My first scar turned 4yr just a week ago. The second scar is almost 3 yr. I do not have fond memories of those scars as they were healing postpartum. But i do not regret them either. Because through those scars, i had my baby boys. Looking at it reminds me of both times when i was in OT, their first cries, the pink mush on their faces, how excited i was to see their faces when a nurse finally brought them to me etc etc. Don't deny the scars. Don't hold on to the pain, but remember the baby that came from it. Looking back, i believe my csects were totally avoidable. Had i educated myself better, i should've just stayed at home and not cave in to an induction. The medical team wheeled me in for csection because of failure to progress at 8cm. I learn now, that it was simply failure to stay upright and labour actively 

It was almost 7 years ago when I had my first, and 4 years ago for the last one. I hope it will really be the last last time. Aamiin... Masya allah. I keep remembering the day that i did my VBA2C everytime I smell the parfume I sprayed in my labor room... To tell you how long my labor was I'm not sure when my labor start, because I had 2 days of "labor trial" if I may call that instead of "false labor", first contractions was like every 10 minutes for the whole night, and second was 3 days later every 4 minutes for the whole night as well. I was almost desperate the next day, I thought doctor must had cut my "birth muscle". And when I was in doubt I pray "Ya allah, please give me your decision". Alhamdulillah I finally gave birth the next day, on 41w + 5d.

My third scar aged 6 years. And it had endured a 14 hours labor (and 8 hours of it consisted of contractions of 1 minutes gap!) My labor pattern was quite "rough" but my scarred womb is still strong to withstand the contractions! Subhanallah... Now that I have a 9 month old baby, it feels unbelievable, indescribable that whenever I touch my csect scar, it is not a new one - no numbness, no soreness, no sadness - but a feeling of satisfaction and empowerement instead due to the fact that I finally had my vaginal birth, against all odds! Alhamdulillah........

Masyaallah amazing strength the scars reminded us. I have accepted every single scar that I had 2007, 2009 and 2011. I have made peace with them. I acknowledged my part of the mistake. Being uninformed and naive. I no longer cry nor feel any anger since I got pregnant with my 4th and now my growing 1 month boy. It was a life transformation and a beginning. Reborn. I wish you all mummies strength and love.

"If you can go normal (varginal delivery) for your baby after 3-section, that is miracle" A comment I get from PUSRAWI gynae when I talked about possiblity to have VBA3C. "Whatever you read from internet is other school of thought, here in Malaysia we have our own rules & regulation. If you wanna VBA3C you can go elsewhere!!" An arrogant remark from gynea at PRINCE COURT hospital. Llittle Courage... Hopeless.. Bring me to Wai Han's blog.. Inspiration even bigger when I get to know Sofia Azyze (VBA4C) via FB... And finally my vision more clearer after attended Maria Zain's class. Inspiration, courage, knowledge that been shared with the people in same boat is sooooo meaningful and left you are not alone. MasyaAllah. VBA3C...I did it!! And you will, too. Insha Allah.

I have 4 scars (2003, 2005, 2007, 2010). My scars had endured 30 hours of active labor and I had successfully gentle birth a 4.2 kg baby in 2012, all natural without any medication. Only we know how strong our womb is. Now when I look at my scars, it smiles back to me.

Past is past, let bygone be bygone, if the scars were due to our own ignorance last time, then this is the time to do it right - learn, learn and learn! Dig as much as possible about natural physiological birth. The more u learn, the less u fear. Now u know that regardless the number of previous scars that u have, you still got THE CHANCE TO VBAC! The term - "say good bye to vaginal birth after 2nd csection" is NO LONGER VALID! We have more and more local living proofs around! LEARN & HAVE FAITH!

Dear sisters who tried to VBAC but ended up with another cut, don't let that bring you down. Have faith that it will make you more stronger. Csect is not a minor thing and you survived it.. That shows how strong you are! InsyaAllah now that you're stronger you can conquer VBAMC in the future!

Thursday, April 10, 2014

Care2share - What is tongue tie (ankyloglossia)?

It happened that i came across one of my friends, who was having problems to breastfeed her newborn. She suspected it was caused by her son's tongue-tie condition. Mashallah, i never heard this before so lets explore and share. I hope so much that my babies will all be healthy and born perfect. (T-T)

This was extracted from baby center.


Tongue-tie (ankyloglossia) happens when the string of tissue under your baby's tongue (frenulum), which attaches her tongue to the floor of her mouth, is too short. If your baby has tongue-tie, her tongue can't move freely, and this can cause problems. If your baby has mild tongue-tie, it may not affect her. But if she has severe tongue-tie, her tongue may almost fuse to the bottom of her mouth. 

Doctors differ in the way they diagnose tongue-tie, especially in mild cases, so it's difficult to know how common it is. Some studies show that about four per cent of babies have tongue-tie, while others claim that it affects about 11 per cent. There is no evidence that tongue-tie is something that babies inherit.

How can I tell if my baby has tongue-tie?

Your baby may be diagnosed with tongue-tie during her first routine check. Your midwife will put her finger in your baby's mouth to check the roof of her mouth and her tongue. But tongue-tie is not always easy to spot. It may not be found until later, for example, if your baby has feeding problems. If you and your baby are finding breastfeeding difficult, ask your midwife, health visitor or doctor to check for tongue-tie.

Breastfeeding isn't easy for every mum, and if you're finding it hard-going, it may not be anything to do with tongue-tie. Talk to your community midwife, or ask to be referred to a breastfeeding specialist, so you can get the help and advice you need.

How does tongue-tie affect feeding?

If your baby has mild tongue-tie, she may not have any feeding problems at all. But if her tongue can't move freely, she may:

  • have trouble latching on
  • slip off your breast while feeding
  • not gain weight as expected

If your baby is struggling to feed because of tongue-tie, you may have sore, painful nipples, which may make you both feel frustrated. Babies who are bottle-fed and who have tongue-tie occasionally have trouble with making a good seal around the bottle teat. This may mean that the milk leaks, and your baby may suffer from wind due to swallowing air.

Will tongue-tie affect my child's speech development?

Tongue-tie is sometimes blamed for speech problems, and this is often why surgery is recommended.
In one small study, having a minor operation did improve children's speech problems. However, there isn't enough evidence to prove that there is a link.

How is tongue-tie treated?

The treatment for tongue-tie is a straightforward operation called a frenulotomy. A doctor or specially-trained midwife puts a snip in the string at the base of the tongue (the frenulum).

In young babies, this snip is often done after just numbing the area. It shouldn't cause your baby any pain, and if she's very young, she may even sleep through it. If your baby is older, she may need to have a general anaesthetic, and the operation could be more complex. Not all experts believe that babies and children with tongue-tie need treatment. Some experts say that it is often unnecessary, and can cause side-effects, such as bleeding and infection.

Some babies may be fine without the procedure. However, guidelines say that frenulotomy is safe for young babies and that it could help with breastfeeding problems, which often disappear straight away after the treatment.


this might be lame but i only know what APGAR score means today..hehehehe
Both my boys scored 9/10. But i was quite sure i wanted to ask, but then forgot.
Until today. kikikiki

Just wondering with mommies who homebirth, the daddy or birth midwife should know how to do the score :)

Interesting article : Ada apa dengan Anak Sulong

Assalamualaikum lovelies.
(Yang berjanggut bermisai pun xpelah..i sekali kategorikan lovelies! ;p)

My first born : Zulhadzrey Iman, has his own head, does things his own ways and i could say very independent indeed. Being the first of the the very first (1st grandchild on bothsides to first-born parents (ye..saya sulong, so as hubby)), he is surely one of a kind. He's one brave boy, very high spirited, and not to mention strong willed. The difference could be clear seen against his brother, amsyar. He could be very sweet and loving at times, and turned into the mini tanzanianDevil the next. Oh my. My house is continuously not tidy because of this little guy.But i don't quite mind. And just let it be. But sometimes i do feel and treat him so highly, i forgot that he's only 3.

This is an article i got from the net. 
Time to slap mommy in the face just to remind myself, my lil Iman is only 3.
Maafkan mommy.

Credited to : Ibu Miah

KESALAHAN YANG TIDAK DISEDARI : Tidak berlaku adil kepada anak SULUNG

Anak sulung...anak sulung....Sedarkah kita anak sulung sering kita aniayai secara sedar atau pun tidak?
Anak sulung adalah anak yang lahir dari semangat cinta dan kasih yang mendalam. Semangat seorang ibu yang mendapat anak sulungnya tentu sangat berbeza. Perasaan dan sifat keibuan yang ada padanya dicurah sebanyak dan sedapat mungkin pada si anak sulung. Anak sulung diberikan apa saja yang baik-baik, ditatang bagaikan minyak yang penuh...........tapi sebelum datangnya anak yang kedua.

Apabila mengandungkan anak yang kedua, perhatian si ibu kepada anak sulung sedikit kurang. Anak yang sulung menyedarinya seawal kandungan si ibu 4 bulan lagi. Apatah lagi jika si ibu tadi bekerja dan dalam masa yang sama menguruskan keperluan rumahtangga selepas waktu bekerja. Dalam konteks ibu bekerja, mengandung dan memberikan perhatian kepada si sulung, tentunya akan ada perkara yang akan terlepas pandang. Ada keperluan dan rutinnya yang akan berubah ...dan si sulung akan menyedarinya dan menguatkan diri sebagai satu pengalaman baru menjadi yang sulung.

Apabila si adik muncul di sisi, walau apa cara sekalipun si sulung perlu menyesuaikan diri pada yang mungkin dianggap pesaing, atau teman atau apa-apa lagi dengan naluri diri menyayangi si adik ini. Cuba anda membayangkan keadaan si sulung. Percayalah, ada yang dapat menyesuaikan diri menyayangi adik tetapi ada juga yang sering merengek, cuba memberitahu perasaan diri tentulah kepada si ibu yang selalunya tak mengerti...

Waktu terus berlaku, diri si sulung semakin membesar, tugas si ibu semakin bertambah. Jangan nafikan....mesti pada masa ini, tangan si sulung sangat bernilai. Si sulung mula mengambil alih sedikit tugas-tugas membantu, juga pada masa yang sama si ibu yang kepenatan mula bertukarlaku. Nak garang masa inilah kan. Di minta diambilkan cawan dan si sulung pun terpinga-pinga, banyak betul kosa kata ibu ni yang aku tak tahu rupanya. Hah! singa, naga, harimau tetapi selalunya tarzan mula hidup bersama-sama, mula memainkan peranan. Kesian si sulung...selalunya tidak faham kehendak si ibu. Bahasa sayang mula bertukar menjadi ayat-ayat suruhan yang banyak.

Si sulung mesti tahu...kau yang sulung mesti tahu! Sedarkah kita akan kosa kata anak sulung kita pada masa ini... Betulkah mereka faham akan apa yang kita sampaikan, yang selalunya kesalahan mereka membuahkan kemarahan kita. Harapan si ibu terlalu tinggi. Pukul....siapa tidak pernah memukul anak sulung mereka. Suruh...Marah...Pukul....rutin baru dalam hidup si sulung itu

Apa jadi kepada anak kedua???????? Play safe mak! I always do....

Anak kedua di mata kebanyakkan ibu adalah anak yang selalu lebih baik dari yang sulung. Lebih mendengar kata, lebih alert, lebih faham, lebih segala-galanya. Kalau disuruh anak yang sulung mandi, anak kedua akan buat dulu. Di suruh membuat kerja rumah...anak kedua akan berkata dia dah siap pun. Si sulung..tahan untuk dimarah bahkan tahan juga untuk dipukul. Itu bahasa biasa ibu kepada saya, yang sulung.

Anak kedua lebih memerhati lebih melihat penderitaan yang sulung apabila dimarah dan dipukul. Tentu pendekatannya adalah untuk menyelamatkan diri agar tidak kena seperti yang sulung. Si ibu pula, ibarat jika sukakan pasukan JDT, busuk macamana pun suka juga. Ibarat kata jika bencikan TRW, bagus macamana pun tidak bermakna. Itulah nasib si sulung dengan para pesaingnya, adik-adiknya.

Berikanlah harapan baru kepada si sulung. Fahamilah mereka. Ceriakanlah hidup mereka.

Kaulah cinta ibu dan ayah, yang sulung...

Have a strong-willed child?  You're lucky! Strong willed children can be a challenge to parent when they’re young, but if sensitively parented, they become terrific teens and young adults.  Self-motivated and inner-directed, they go after what they want and are almost impervious to peer pressure.  As long as parents resist the impulse to "break their will," strong-willed kids often become leaders. 

(Iman's teacher once told us, he found a 6 yr old hiding behind the school's fridge, because iman told him so.He does'nt want to come out until Iman let's him to. He was twice Iman's size (--") )

What exactly is a strong-willed, or spirited, child?  Some parents call them "difficult" or “stubborn,” but we could also see strong-willed kids as people of integrity who aren’t easily swayed from their own viewpoints.  Strong-willed kids want to learn things for themselves rather than accepting what others accept, so they test the limits over and over. They want desperately to be "in charge" of themselves, and will sometimes put their desire to "be right" above everything else. When their heart is set on something, their brains seem to have a hard time switching gears.  Strong-willed kids have big, passionate feelings and live at full throttle.

More at Dr Laura Markham page.


jom terjah :)
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