Love is always something special for me.
Oh yes I'm just always hopelessly romantic like that.haha. Coming across a huge pregnant picture of me this morning, reminded me how wonderful was being pregnant like. Someone really important to me was growing inside of me. Mmg seronok. Now I'm home, laying down taking some time back from work, with two mini guys running around the house. Two mini versions of half me and half the person I love.
This reminded me of my own stories. im no beauty queen but life had given me my fair share :) I had reruns ofseveral episodes of my love stories. During highschool, it was all ups and downs and under and over but never the real thing. I found my 1st love when I was 19. And he was 5yrs older than me. He was way from North Africa. Oh yes he's an African hailing all the way from Chad. He's nice and gentle and a great Muslim. A final year IT student. Everything was nice that time until I was slapped into reality when I realized we could never get married. Then everything was getting much harder and we went desperate and seperated ways when I was in 2nd yr that time.
Then a 53yrs old (then) Malay trainer approached me during my facilitating days. I was 21, a camp counselor and an active camper. I joined a few summer camps and was actively involved in jungle trekkings and mountain climbing, and sleeping under the stars was becoming a routine. This old man was 53 but looked 33, was a retired soldier and wanted me as 3rd wife. I dated him and after a year we parted ways. I was dead crazy back then I guess ..pheww.. 3rd wife? What was I thinking!
I was lost and my semester pointer dropped to 3.0 that time, when one of my lecturers saved me. He was an Egyptian, with green eyes and a great heart and was a top professor in the campus. He noticed my grades. Well, he kind of noticed a lot of other things about me altogether. Hahaha. Time passed by and I was caught again in the love triangle. I don't know why but I have this soft spot for old guys that time. I swore by the name that young men could never win my heart..oh my of course I didn't realized how wrong could that be..hahaha
He was 38 and I was 22, but that was not an issue that time. My grades was great that time. I scored 3.9 at most but never scored flat 4.0. Well, I was dating an academician what do you expect.hahaha. It was all sugary and candy canes and butter mints until I got to know that he was already married! Married ok. I dated him 4yrs and how I didn't notice. It was really stupid. So that was the end of it. The end.
I dated another guy not long after. He was 2yrs older, worked in proton tgmalim and married with a kid but I didn't quite cared. Hahaha. He quited proton in 2009 and joined the government sector and was a great guy. I knew from the beginning that this will nvr work but just went on w the flow. We went out on alternate nights, the nights he was occupying his wife I went out with other guys.hahaha.. We stopped went his wife found out and went all gaga about it.hahhaha..gila.
Then by end of 2009 I had enough of men, and found my way a little bit closer to Allah and gave all my hopes and faith to Him in who he had chose to be the love of my life. I registered myself for masters study to find a good way umm to use my ample time and how to spend the money I earned. I prayed to Him for what he bestowed upon me as I was already ready to allow myself be forever alone.
1mth later, back from the 1st day of class in my newly registered sarjana school, a dark guy caught my attention by asking me about R3 cars. He was slim, handsome, talks with a pantaitimur accent and smelt nice. Then one thing led to another, i realized that this guy had great eyes, great confidence and a great heart. He won me with his antics, oh my. We were from different worlds but the spark was already there. Everything was alive, spontaneous and sparkling bright. We were much in love of course.We got married 6months after :)
To be frank, true love came when I least expected. He was 2yrs younger, and had a list of emma maembong look-a-likes as girlfriends with a reputation of more than one at once, even his father was surprised he chose me. And of course his father agreed with my motherly traits kehkehkeh.
Approaching 5yrs of marriage I am still hopelessly in love with this handsome guy and pray to Allah our jodoh is strong enough to bring us both, and our children blessed upon us to Jannah. Amin.
For the earlier 20s of my life, for all the people I met earlier in my life are all with reasons. And I forgive u all. Inshallah.
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